“But Trident”, we hear you whine, “surfing is a subculture already!” This is true folks. However, we are not a homogenised conglomerate of robotic clones, just like any other subculture throughout human history. Each surf clique at any given break, town, scene, city, country or even continent has their own group within a group within a group. To whit:
Number 1: The Muso’s.
Somehow, music and surfing have always gone together. To a non-surfer, when they imagine a surfer on a wave, it’s usually replete with a picturesque beach scene background, with either the Beach Boys or a ukele as the soundtrack. The music is an integral aspect of the classic beach scene. Sure, the tunes don’t necessarily have to be the Beach Boys, or a ukulele – or Dick Dale. Jack Johnson is another big one. It could be Slayer, or Black Flag or Tupac playing, but you get what we’re saying. Music is inseparable from surfing, and tons of surfers are musicians, or are at least fans of music. Indeed, there is a smaller clique of really famous musicians that surf. Kirk Hammett and Rob Trujillo from Metallica, the afore-mentioned Jack Johnson, Chris Izaak… the list drags on. And somehow, there’s still a ton of lesser known muso’s that surf. Trident is one of them by the way. Look out for our upcoming single “Where does this rash come from?” on all online streaming platforms soon.
Number 2: The Athletes.
This lot can be surfers first and foremost. Some rip, while others treat surfing as a way to get fit over and above their swimming, running, cycling and gym regimes. Then there are the dudes that are expert sports people in other realms: the rugby players, the triathletes, the motor sports enthusiasts. Cricketers. Footballers. Golfers. Competitive pool hustlers. Many of these okes are cool, but some are more jock-types who treat surfing without its due respect, like a silly but harmless distraction. Ain’t nuthin’ wrong with that. Did you know Lewis Hamilton once proclaimed surfing to be his favourite sport? That’s a huge endorsement right there.
Number 3: The Networkers.
Ladies and gentlemen, we present you with the future Elon Musks and Steve Jobs of your local surf lineup. While it is common for many people to make business deals over golf, or online, or in foreign countries, or in back alleys with cash while constantly looking over their shoulders for the Po-po, the surf lineup has become a place to do some serious business networking. Fair enough if said surfers are already involved in the surf industry, like shapers, surf shop employees, pro’s, brilliant surf website writers, it makes sense to do a bit of self promotion. Similarly and regardless of industry, support your surfer mates. But so-called influencers trying to sway you to swing them some work? Brokers? Firebreathers? Cult members? “Model agents” (Read: pornographers)? Cheesemongers? Plantation owners? Astronauts? People selling pyramid schemes? Leeches? Manufacturers of defective truck parts? Lispers? Mimes? Exotic pet salespersons? Vulcans? Pirates? Sasquatches? Nah. That’s for the car park ya tools. Although, an enterprising psychologist who surfs would no doubt have no problem finding a full patient list within a day by patrolling the lineup.
Number 4: The Green/Yoga/Zen-heads.
Ah man. Trident has tackled the topic of this subset of the surfing crowd numerous times in many different approaches over the years. Let’s see if we can track down just a few former examples of where their dreadlocked heads have popped up in other articles – here, here and here just for a few examples. Search “hippie” or similar terms in the site and you’ll find plenty more. Anyhow, the zen surfers are easy to spot and pretty much utterly harmless to everyone and everything apart from weed plants and granola bars. Still, as surfers we each need to have a smidgen of this green zen vibe in us. After all, we are people who are constantly surrounded by and reliant on nature for our favourite pastime.
Number 5: The Equipment Geeks.
Just to confuse the issue even further, these oddballs fall into further subcategories: retro-heads, the up-to-the-minute tech guys, the brand sluts, etc. You may come across a guy who can barely pop up, but will be able to drone on in excruciating detail about the pro’s and con’s of single fins versus twin fins. Likewise, some clown banging on about a wetsuit brand that ceased to exist in the 90’s still “being “the best ever” despite how technology has come a long way and said brand was about as flexible as concrete. The equipment geeks are pretty cool all in all though, and often there’s a gem of knowledge in the otherwise steaming pile of manure they’re constantly spewing. So pay careful attention boys and girls, you may just learn something.
