Plastic and other assorted garbage on the beach and water.

When we speak of other “assorted garbage”, we’re doesn’t not necessarily referring to tik-addled car guards.

Booted or barefoot surfing?

“Sure, you can laugh at your bootie-less mates as they clamber awkwardly over rocks like lobotomised crabs”

The science of sun protection.

Sunglasses, hats, umbrellas, suits of armour and only ever going outdoors at night are also recommended, but sunscreen covers you when those suggestions don’t.