In the spirit of the country’s current obsession with names and the emotive connotations they carry, Trident is attempting a very unbiased opinion of what the country’s Top Five names for surf spots across the coast are. No mean feat if you ask us, in a country riddled with such classic, interesting surf spot names such as Thermopylae, Craters and er, the Pier. Last week’s Poseidon Post’s article tackled this issue from another angle, read it here. In due course we shall also have a look at the Top Five worst surf spot names to balance the whole thing. But for now, without too much deliberation on the meaning and history of each name and focusing instead on the coolness factor, Trident presents the Top Five most awesome SA surf break names:
Number 1: Loch Ness (Port Elizabeth/Gqeberha)
This spot is named after jagged rocks resembling the spine of the legendary Loch Ness monster, jutting out of the water right at the take off zone. The imaginative quality of this spot’s name cannot be understated. The quality of the wave however, tends to be overstated though. An often gnarly, late take-off into a very mellow, strangely flat wave is the norm, but occasionally much longer, walling waves can surprise surfers out there. Decent waves at Loch Ness allow a competent surfer a lip to hack a few off the top. Sometimes there’s even a very tricky barrel to navigate, before the longer breaking wave ends up in a smaller bay. Where there are yet more rocks, less suggestive of fabled mythical beasts and perhaps more suggestive of medieval torture devices if you time your exit poorly.
Number 2: Dungeons (Cape Town)
This name immediately signals exactly what you’re in for. There’s no ambiguity here folks, as a spot named Dungeons hardly evokes images of hula girls playing the ukulele with flower necklaces while overweight, brown skinned okes in floral boardshorts cruise on logs on tiny waves. No, Dungeons is as ominous and dangerous sounding as befits Africa’s premier big wave spot. To add to the fun, it’s sharky as hell and the water is colder than a polar bear’s mother-in-law. In fact, the only unfortunate part of this name is the fact there’s no a sister spot nearby named Dragons. Geddit?
Number 3: Cave Rock (the Bluff, Durban)
This name conjures up images of a massive cavern at the beach, in which perhaps lurks some primeval monster out of Norse or Greek mythology such as the kraken or a cyclops. This is a gnarly, gnarly wave. People have been hurt out here, badly – so once again, the name kinda sums up what kinda wave you’re about to experience.
Number 4: Supertubes (Jeffrey’s Bay)
This name says exactly what the break does. It produces super tubes on a regular basis. Although nobody really calls it by its full name on a regular basis any more, it’s just “Supers” these days. This is kinda like shortening anyone named Matthew to Matt, Joseph to Joe, Anthony to Tony, or Zuma to Dick. This same shortening often applies to many spots, cases in point being Magna’s and Bruce’s in the same general wave-rich region. The sheer overexposure of its name means Supertubes is almost taken for granted in the surfing world, but if you stop and think about it – it’s actually a very cool name – inspiring (Trident believes which much obvious evidence) the Portuguese version. Supertubos. Which is also cool as balls. But we’re talkin’ SA surf names only here, team.
Number 5: Deadman’s Ledge (the Wild Coast)
Surf spot names don’t get much more evocative than this. Whether Deadman’s allows your mind to suggest a decomposing corpse, or some kind of pirates’s treasure cove, this infamous ledge in the wild coast has a pretty memorable name whichever way you cut it. Yet again, any surf spot with a variant of death in its name has to be taken seriously, as we have previously discussed how little irony was involved when naming a surf spot. More’s the pity we feel. How rad would it be to have a 10 foot death pit named Candyfloss?
