It would be far too easy to simply make a list of fictional surfers, like Bodhi in Point Break or talented penguin Cody Maverick in Surf’s Up. No, we have to dig a little deeper here, and figure out which characters in your favourite movies, books, comics, video games etc would be trying to get barrelled when they weren’t busy fighting off criminals, orcs, Thanos, Shredder and tax evaders.
Number 1: Legolas Greenleaf (Lord of the Rings)
Just last week we discussed how Legolas not only looks like a stereotypical surfer with his long blonde hair, but also how he swiped a shield from an Uruk-hai he had just donnered and proceeded to surf down a staircase like it was a monster peak at Teahupoo, all the while firing off arrows from his quiver like a hero. We also mentioned last week that anyone with a quiver could be considered a surfer, so as promised – we’re recycling the joke to include Robin Hood, William Tell, Hawkeye, the Green Arrow and Medusa from Clash of the Titans (her quiver is somewhat sketchy, as she was shooting snakes from her own damn hair – but hey.) Feel free to suggest more archers as surfers in the comments section.
Number 2: Michelangelo (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles)
Weirdly enough, the original Renaissance sculptor and artist for whom this arse-kicking shelled mutant is named could’ve been a surfer, as with all the artists these turtles were named after – they were so inhumanly talented they could pretty much do it all. Nevertheless, Michelangelo is an actual historical figure and we’re talking fictional folks. So Trident reckons turtle Michelangelo would be the most likely culprit of the four green ninja’s to be the surfer – he’s the coolest, the most laidback and the one who seems to skateboard the most – and honestly, if Trident wasn’t so damn lazy in terms of research (Ed’s note: like you ever do research) – we’d probably be able to find at least one instance in the cartoons where he actually surfs for real. Also, Michelangelo’s main enemy is named Shredder, so the villain could for all we know be a surfer himself.
Number 3: Percy Jackson (Percy Jackson and the Olympians)
Percy Jackson – for those who haven’t read the super fun books nor seen the okay-but-fun movies – is the illegitimate son of Poseidon, set in modern day New York. As the son of the sea god himself, Percy can control water, the ocean’s creatures, breathe underwater, withstand great pressure, depths and temperatures and such. If that’s not a pedigree to become a great surfer, I don’t know what is. However, Percy is also one of the few fictional characters on this list who is expressly asked, by Nico the son of Hades – as the son of Poseidon if Percy surfs and is probably insanely good at it. To which Trident recalls him replying, “Jeez Nico, I dunno – I’ve never tried!” or something to that effect. Just as well, as he’d probably be like, the best surfer ever – hands down, and would set such a high standard everyone else would simply give up the sport for good.
Number 4: Thor (Thor / The Avengers)
Like Legolas, Thor looks like a surfer. In the movies, he’s played by Chris Hemsworth – who is in fact a surfer in real life. Check the clip of him surfing with the great Mick Fanno himself. Drops mic. Also, honourable mention must be made of comic superhero surfers such as: Spiderman (sticking to boards while doing 900 degree airs), Aquaman (Duh), the Silver Surfer – etc etc.
Number 5: Thomas Magnum (Magnum PI)
The idea of this legendary PI being a surfer is predicated on one single fact – he lives in Hawaii. Trident can’t imagine anyone living in Oahu and not trying surfing at least once. Now, not remembering the original series too well as a laaitie, not following the remake much at all – perhaps there’s been a scene or two of him doing some solid hacks, mighty moustache and all – but this is not any kind of guarantee. Still, we’re sticking to our guns on this one. Magnum lives in Hawaii, so he must’ve surfed. Occasionally. Weekend warrior perhaps.
