Although a few weeks ago, memories of the 2022 J Bay Open linger on like many other of the most positive moments in this country. Winning rugby World Cups, the first free and fair elections (for Trident’s money, it’s been a gradual downhill from there), Charlize winning the Oscar, the 2010 Soccer World Cup, the municipality finally repainting that yield sign near your house after pleading with them for a decade, Eskom moving from Stage 6 to Stage 2 – you get it. RSA on fire. We need whatever good news we can. And some sense of pride.
Like Kim Kardashian, J Bay displayed its assets to the entire world this July. Although Trident remains convinced most surfers repeatedly and tragically undercall waves, we can’t argue that it was at least 6-8 foot. From the back. Although probably bigger. (Seriously, Jordy Smith is 6’3, and you’re calling that wave 3-4 foot? Have you squeezed in a few extra dimensions from outside the universe, or is your eyesight so lopsided, your left eye sits in between your nipples ?)
The conditions were on point.
Anyhow, courtesy of Poseidon, J Bay delivered. The WSL has come under fire of late, sometimes unfairly, but the positivity surrounding the only African event on the Championship Tour was well deserved. The only thing that could’ve possibly made the conditions any better was better weather, and warmer water. And possibly waves made from beer.
No competitor could have wanted any better. Except to have won of course.
Sure, the South Africans didn’t go as far as any red-blooded Saffa would’ve liked, but two Ozzies in the Final kinda made a nice change from Brazilian dominance. Kinda like eating lekker junk food all the time only to be pleasantly surprised to find some broccoli on your plate. This seems like an insult. It’s not intended to be. We’re just referring to a “too much of a good thing kinda vibe”. All power to Toledo et al going forward though.
Now what?
Speaking of, the CT top 5 has all but been decided. This doesn’t exactly make for edge of your seat viewing for the last remaining events. Although, as the next event on tour is Chopes, a wave with the ferocity of a hyena trying to chew your face off, no doubt it’ll make for a spectacle.
Anyhow, back to the J Bay spectacle. And spectacle it was after covid prevented, well – pretty much everything. Spectacle.Pro’s. Throngs of spectators. Kids screaming blue murder every time they saw an Igarashi or a Jordy. Hangers-on of every kind. Weird fringe festival types. Groupies brandishing placards with slogans like “I’ll swap my sister aged 21 for your board.” Here’s a thought. Show a picture of her next time. For all we know, she could look like Jabba the Hutt. Not a fair trade then, we say.
The waves and the crowds. Both were fairly large. But the actual surfing? Over the last weeks Trident has heard every kind of accolade. “Best surfing I’ve ever seen.” “Best surfing at J Bay ever.” “Biggest barrel at J Bay I’ve seen live.” “Rail surfing at its finest.”“I could take Jackson Baker.” “Medina smells of fresh espetada.” “You are very handsome, Trident.”
The GOAT was on fire. Despite bowing out early(ish) thanks to a buzzer beater, the man is 50 for heaven’s sake and still surfs like a Brazilian teenager hopped up on industrial-strength adrenaline.
