Fins. Fish have them, we covet them. Many marine mammals have them also. And if they don’t, say in the instance of sea otters, they have webbed feet. As well as cold and water resistant fur in those adorable little cuties. In evolutionary terms, when you really start thinking about it – we humans are as utterly useless in the sea as every Kardashian is at well, anything.
Anyhow, let’s focus on something integral to modern surfing. No, not violent localism northe vinyl changing mat – fins.
Fins. When surfing was first invented, the original innovators basically used a kak old piece of wood that was vaguely flat one would imagine. Eventually the board was planed and shaped to be a little sleeker, a little more functional. Still, fins took a while to be applied to surfboards.
Fins. Effing fins. You can’t go fins-free unless you actually have fins on your board. Conversely, fins-free can refer to the lack of fins on a surfboard. Argh. Fins. Fins spin me out. Which is ironic, as fins prevent your board from spinning out. Perhaps we should superglue fins to the heads of psychiatric patients to prevent them spinning out. And to be fair, if they surf, the sheer volume of kinds of fins probably made them spin out in the first place. A vicious cycle. In fact – there’s the answer – take up cycling instead, to prevent the ordeal of having to deal with fins in the first place.
Back in the mists of time, us surfers only had two choices when it came to fins. Fixed in fins – or you don’t surf. Granted, fixed in fins still have the benefits of stability, strength and the fact you’re unlikely to lose a fin or two (or the entire set), but removable fins were the next evolution in surfing.
Of course, this almost immediately presented some decision problems. FCS or Futures? What size? What material? Why do equipment manufacturers unceasingly do this to us – offering a wide range of possibilities, thereby driving us to the very brink of insanity?!
Futures? FCS? Fixed fins? FCS2?
Keels? Quads? Twinnies? Single fins? Fins shaped like world war 2 fighter planes? So. Many. Choices. Once you’ve recovered from too much drinking caused by the anxiety of deciding on a fin system you’ll use across all your boards, you then have to worry about stuff like fin sizes. The fin size is kinda easy, based on whether you’re a lightweight or Godzilla. Also, wave size – bigger wave – bigger fin. However, it’s the fin shapes that become pretty confusing in their diversity.
What about the actual fin material? Carbon? Resin? Plastic? Swiss cheese? Gold-plated? All have a function, even if it’s just price. (In case you were wondering, the cheaper the cost – the kakker the fin.)
Stuff like fin base, depth, rake and sweep (which sounds kinda like the art of custodial work) all play a huge part in the performances of your fins. So, if you get bad advice, refuse to listen to good advice – or want to surf like Fanno and buy his signature fins despite the fact you’re overweight, have only been surfing for 3 months and your local wave has as much power as those old batteries you found in your office drawer last week- you may just find your fins not working for you. Trident has spoken.
