I’m one of those ou’s that prefer to get all my shopping done in one fell swoop. Groceries and surf equipment will be done on the same day by gum. Thanks to capitalism and obscenely sized and structured shopping malls for this convenience. However, due to a tragic, unforeseen grocery packing disaster – I now have a biltong and yoghurt flavoured 4/3mm wetsuit. Mike Rochip, Strap
A coupla days ago, I had the day off work. Instead of being wise and going surfing, I instead decided to go to Home Affairs, geting my passport sorted for my upcoming Indo trip. So ja, there’s your surfing connection right there. Only that. Anyway, the intercom announced a customer’s number and to go to Teller 3. So said customer proceeded to wander around the reception area like a lost fart for 20 minutes. This, despite repeated announcements to go to Teller 3. A hint: Teller 3 was between Teller 2 and Teller and all the tellers are in one straight line. I say all of humanity needs to be sued for producing an imbecile like this. Fred Up, Garage Bay
I dunno about you guys, but I scheme it would be really cool to have Optimus Prime drive you to your surf spot. Optimus could then transform into robot mode, eliminating the need for additional car guards. In fact, he could actually literally eliminate car guards. Bum Bill B, Cybertron
I’m pretty sure all you Trident readers have concerns with the approaching summer season. Haven’t you all been inconvenienced, confounded and frustrated by clueless European beginner surfers in our lineups? It’s almost a rite of passage these days. So, how to deal? Well, just last week I explained to a German beginner surfer why ditching your board in a crowded lineup is wrong and dangerous. “It is like just leaving your car running and unattended in the middle of The Autobahn, ja?” Fräulein Stout, Puddles
Fellow Eastern Cape surfers – there still is virtually zero sand along much of our coastline.. This fact renders many of our iconic waves damn near unsurfable. So I reckon we start filling in the reef. With what you ask? Well, I reckon with the crushed skulls of surfers who drop in, paddle around and snake. Potential crowd problem sorted out as well then. Two Birds, Onestone
