Cleaning your surfboard(s). This article would’ve just as easily slotted into Surf Science. However, there is no hard nor fast rule when it comes to cleaning surfboards, so cleaning boards cannot qualify as hard science. Particularly as you are simply cleaning a surfboard, not splitting atoms, splicing the genes of unrelated species or curing wetsuit crotch. That’s like science stuff.
So, no surf science really here. Indeed, there are plenty surfers around for whom cleaning surfboards is viewed as suspiciously “swish”, or some communist plot against the hard fought right for individual self expression by having surfboards dirtier than a politician’s pockets. Or their underpants.
So let’s dive into whether or not cleaning a surfboard is even necessary.
Trident will ask you, esteemed reader – do you clean your wetsuit? For roughly 99% of all surfers, the answer would be a resounding “heck yes”. As for the remaining 1% who answer a resounding “heck no” to cleaning your wetsuit? We assume those filthy beasts are content to leave their saltwater soaked suit crumpled in a dirty corner of their garage to breed bacteria and the smell of a fisherman’s bait bucket forgotten in the dunes. Therefore, their opinions are as valuable to this article as expired wood glue.
So yes, if you are willing to clean your wetsuit post surf, why not your surfboard? It must be stated that South Africa is a water scarce country. Although our recent run of rainy weather would prove otherwise and has all but kicked the latest drought’s butt. Nevertheless, Trident assumes you’d prefer to use water on a toilet that flushes or a decent hot shower post surf, rather than kinda wasting water by cleaning your surfboard. Sensible. Unless of course, you’re one of those clean-wetsuits-are-against-nature types. Or you refuse to wash your wetsuit because you are just plain bone idle lazy. In which case Trident also assumes you’d also shun showers, preferring instead the caress of the ocean’s water to cleanse you. All well and good, until your car, house and most disgustingly – your bed – smells like salt, algae, seaweed, fish guts and regret.
Save water, not face.
So yes we get it, being water responsible won’t necessarily include wasting nature’s most precious resource on surf equipment. However – just like your wetsuit, – a surfboard can simply, well, start to smell. And over above freshening its reek, there are several benefits to occasionally cleaning your board.
Cleaning your surfboard(s)… necessity or nonsense? Firstly, dried crystallised salt will eventually cause havoc with your wax job The same with any surfboard’s deck grip. So rinse your board when its practical to do so. Every now and then though, it’s a good idea to go one step further and entirely scour older wax off. How come? Well, wax gets slippery and thus less effective the longer it’s on your board. Not only that, the wax gets dirtier the longer it remains on your surfboard. Is your wax all dull and hard and a dirty brownish black colour? That’s not just “hard shreddin’” team. That is the accumulation on your surf wax of tiny neoprene particles from your wetsuit as well as dried salt, ocean debris, sunscreen and various other nasty things. The end result will be useless, slippery wax and a very probable humiliating attempt at a pop up.
So replace your wax once in a while.
We mentioned underpants earlier. And although Trident deems it unlikely a politician actually even knows how to put on new underwear, we assume you, dear reader, know how to do so. Unless of course, you’re part of the oft mentioned 1% . For whom crotch chafe, fungus riddled unmentionables and the over powering smell of low tide screams “authenticity” more than clean underwear (or indeed, any underwear) does.
A fresh coat of wax after cleaning makes your board look and smell great. An easy enough hack then. Freshly cleaned surfboard even look newer. Think of the lucky pro’s. Those so-and-so’s are gifted new surfboard models every half hour, so they never get to surf a board long enough for their wax to look dirty. Trident’s point; new wax looks, well – new.
Clean the old wax off by leaving your board in the sun for a few minutes, then remove the melted stuff with a wax comb. Comb the wax off gently though, as if you’re apologising to your surfboard for making it look bad when you kooked that last turn.
Never use stuff like acetone or gasoline – it’ll melt your surfboard faster than your stoke on a flat day. You can use other solvents like turps or thinners, but shapers would presumably tar and feather us for saying so. So use solvents sparingly folks. So, how often do you clean your precious surfboard(s)?
